Richard Stallman resigns from the FSF

I first came across half the age + 7 "rule" from various of my father's friends 30+ years ago - but it wasn't about "consent", but dating or marriage, and it only applied to men. Culturally that seemed apropo'... then. Nowadays...

I think all that is shifting - and we do have a major cultural change in the always-online-under-25s that is difficult to understand. I do often wish I'd had kids so I'd "get it" more instinctively, as making the needed post-50 shift to sexless-father figure consistently - has taken me a couple years and I'm still not quite done with it.

It's doubly hard when you shift around various cultures outside america as I do, and also have a completely different life in the musical world. There's professional mode, theres other modes - and if you've ever seen the movie zelig, it's really hard when in a group of mixed ages, cultures, and interests to not screw up something with someone, male or female, in that group, when tackling a difficult issue.

Flirting is a high art in europe, what you can say, or when you kiss or hug or touch someone to make a point varies enormously by country (it does in the states, too - I've spent a lot of time in the south, where addressing someone of the opposite sex as "darling" is pretty normal, but on the west coast verboten)

Relationships between the sexes are rediculously tricky, more so across an age or cultural barrier, and thus I also think half your age + 7 is a good basic rule (for either sex) before assuming you might share enough cultural values to interact without having to be very, very, careful.

I like that more formal rules for "consent" and robust communication have arrived for a group of 30-40 year olds that I sometimes hang out with. There's some good books, too, like one on "love language". I learned that "you look nice today" was not particularly good anymore after someone took offense, but a direct complement - "great shoes" or something like that, was ok. Which was great to learn because otherwise treating people as if they were all wearing sexless burlap sacks is not a world I want to live in, a world where the only dopamine hit you get is from a like button.

But you have to really work at it to present as the person you want to be at all times,
and really be aware of the other person. I've screwed up many times in my life when I wasn't paying sufficient attention and was very happy when someone corrected me or showed me where I was wrong, and very unhappy when someone ghosted me for something I didn't understand. Nuance is a difficult thing for geeks. And worthy of detailed study!

I actually like much of the "code of conduct" thing, for professional rules, except that I wish everyone had the same view of soft language that george carlin did.

Imagine a world where rms had found love; someone to balance him out. It could still happen.