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On the sickness of our community

On the sickness of our community

Posted Oct 23, 2014 12:09 UTC (Thu) by tao (subscriber, #17563)
In reply to: On the sickness of our community by Wol
Parent article: On the sickness of our community

Let me put this in a different light:

What if, instead of supporting a proposal that discriminates homosexuals, he would've supported a proposal to reinstate racial or gender discrimination (there is, after all, biblical support for both of these)? Would you still have thought it to be destroying democracy to object to him?

Let's say he would've been a proponent for rescinding women's suffrage. what then?

Saying that "Hey, we don't want someone who supports discrimination to be the leader of our community" isn't destroying democracy. It's merely taking a different political stand.

Anything you do or say has consequences. Speaking is legal, yet lying risks getting you sued for slander. Shit-talking your employer will probably get you fired, as will (hopefully) sexual harassment.

If he'd been a known supporter of discrimination against women or non-whites, no one would've raised an eyebrow if he had been questioned on those grounds, no matter if he would've claimed it to be for religious reasons (just imagine the outrage if this would've been a Muslim who would've supported a proposal that would discriminate women; though I guess what with the Islamophobia in the US there would probably have been an outrage about the Muslim bit alone).

Why should supporting discrimination against homosexuals be somehow different?

Because despite your claim that it's about religious convictions that's all it really boils down to; the religious thing is just an excuse for the prejudice.

If it truly were a matter of following the bible, why isn't he (and the rest of those who claim to oppose equal rights for homosexuals) standing up for laws that condone stoning of children who speak up against their parents, bans against multi-fabric cloth, seafood, tattoos, etc? Why don't they stand up for returning to biblical marriages (where you'd buy your wife, have several wifes, where widows should marry their brother in law to ensure proper inheritance, etc.)

If the people who oppose the rights of homosexuals would at least have the guts to stand up and say "I oppose equal rights for homosexuals because I think it's icky" then I would at least respect them for being honest (though still question their poor judgement). As long as they hide behind a selective interpretation of their religion, however, I just find it cowardly.


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On the sickness of our community

Posted Oct 23, 2014 20:08 UTC (Thu) by dlang (guest, #313) [Link] (5 responses)

so you are calling for about half the country to loose their jobs and never work again until they make a public confession and beg forgiveness

Redefining a vote or a contribution to a political campaign (especially one that had such a large amount of support) to be harassment is a problem.

> though I guess what with the Islamophobia in the US there would probably have been an outrage about the Muslim bit alone

So why is it that Muslim countries that stone homosexuals and girls who bring disgrace on their families for the sin of being raped get a pass, but voting to keep the definition of the word "Marriage" what it's traditionally been throughout history is grounds for effective lynching?

> if the people who oppose the rights of homosexuals would at least have the guts to stand up and say "I oppose equal rights for homosexuals because I think it's icky" then I would at least respect them for being honest

but you somehow cannot respect them for being honest when they state that their opposition is not because it's 'icky' but because they see it as redefining what marriage is.

On the sickness of our community

Posted Oct 23, 2014 20:42 UTC (Thu) by rahulsundaram (subscriber, #21946) [Link]

>So why is it that Muslim countries that stone homosexuals and girls who bring disgrace on their families for the sin of being raped get a pass, but voting to keep the definition of the word "Marriage" what it's traditionally been throughout history is grounds for effective lynching?

It is NOT the same in all muslim countries. Even otherwise, just because some places in the world are worse doesn't mean that countries which have moved past the religion based government model should go back to it.

>but you somehow cannot respect them for being honest when they state that their opposition is not because it's 'icky' but because they see it as redefining what marriage is.

Marriage has been redefined many many times where originally it was about treating women as property to most recently to allow interracial marriages in U.S. Pretending as if had the same definition and purpose throughout history is counter factual.

On the sickness of our community

Posted Oct 24, 2014 9:46 UTC (Fri) by tao (subscriber, #17563) [Link] (3 responses)

No, I'm not calling for about half the country to lose their jobs. I'm fairly sure I didn't say that supporting discrimination to be harassment either. But I definitely think it's problematic. No matter how many supported it. Women's suffrage had a lot of opponents too. Racial discrimination was supported by a lot of people. Support for slavery even was a contributing factor to civil war.

The level of support for a discriminatory cause does not make it less discriminatory. It just shows that people are afraid of change, probably because they belong to the majority that isn't discriminated against.

Even so, we're not talking about any average person here. We're talking about a person that has a leading position in a community and thus is representative for said community.

Admittedly I would feel uneasy with such co-workers, but of course I wouldn't call for their resignation. It's a wholly different thing when it's someone high up in the hierarchy however. With great power comes great responsibility. People higher in the hierarchy of power should be held to higher standards.

BTW, who said anything about giving Muslim countries that stone homosexuals or rape victims a free pass? Well, the US foreign policies towards some of them seem to be very forgiving (for some reason anything Saudi Arabia does seem to be acceptable, anything else is heavily criticised), but there seem to be no less criticism of Muslim conutries than others.

Though since the US treat several of the Muslim countries as altogether evil and assume every single Muslim to be a terrorist, it might seem as though they don't get criticized for individual things, but that's only because they're already under a blanket condemnation. Sort of like with Cuba, where singular missteps on behalf of Cuba don't get criticized much, because Cuba for some inscrutable reason is considered so utterly evil that US citizens are not even permitted to travel there (even though they're free to travel to far, far worse countries in terms of human rights).

But you know, if you cannot clean up garbage on your neighbour's yard, then at least clean up your own. Be a good example.

But now for your main argument -- that about the traditional meaning of marriage throughout history:

Various past traditional marriages:

* Arranged marriages

* Polygamy

* The groom paying the father of the bride for the right to marry her

* The father of the bride paying the groom to get rid of his daughter
| obviously these two did not apply at the same time :)

* Rape victims being "avenged" by having their rapists marry them

* Levirate marriage (widows being forced to marry their brother in law)

* Children being wedded to grown-ups

You seem to suffer from the widespread, but false, notion that traditional means good and that it should also mean immutable.

Other traditions of the past: stoning, cutting off the hands off of criminals, flogging, spanking children, human sacrifice, etc.

Comparing a community calling for their leader to be someone who do not call for discrimination people just because of their sexual orientation with lynching is a slight bit of hyperbole, don't you agree?

Instead of defending the one male + one female "as God intended" variant of marriage based on tradition, how about you justify the discrimination of homosexuals based on reason?

Marriage serves the following purposes in modern society:

1.) Providing a simplified legal framework for inheritance
| homosexual couples need this just as much as straight couples

2.) Simplifies the process of deciding whom should be the legal guardian of children (adoptive; children from previous relationships -- some people in homosexual relationships are bisexual, others came out late, etc.; insemination; surrogate mothers, etc.)
| homosexual couples need this just as much as heterosexual couples

3.) Joint taxation
| homosexual couples would want this just as much as straight couples

4.) Joint benefits
| If a heterosexual spouse should get benefits through their company
| just for being married to one of its employees, so should
| a homosexual spouse

and the good old "traditional"

5.) Affirmation of love
| Homosexual couples love each other just as much as
| heterosexual couples do

If a church chooses not to give its blessing to a married couple just because they are homosexual, then that should be their prerogative. They should, however, not be able to have a say in whether said couple should be able to get married in the first place.

Marriage is a matter between the state and the couple and the state is (well, in the case of the US and a few other civilized countries at least) secular.

Holy matrimony is a matter between the church and the couple.

If you want to be a member of a church that wants to keep holy matrimony reserved strictly to its heterosexual members, then so be it.

If Jesus really existed (as a divine being that is, rather than just a carpenter who preached about a lot of nice things), I suspect he'd be more offended by people trying to discriminate based on whom they love. But I leave that for the churches and their congregations.

Please explain to me how, apart from a redefinition of your view of what a marriage "should" be, equal marriage rights would somehow threaten your marriage or your possibility to get married? How would it affect your daily life?

I can think of of a few things: some homosexuals around you will become happier and feel less discriminated against. Some homosexuals around you will have to worry less about their future.

Sure, there are a few minor, minor things that will influence you in a negative way: due to joint taxation there'll be slightly less tax dollars flowing to your state. But somehow I don't think this is a financial issue.

PS: Traditionally divorce was a non-existing concept, later becoming something very restricted. Nowadays there are marriages that only last a few weeks or even just a day or two.

On the sickness of our community

Posted Oct 24, 2014 13:54 UTC (Fri) by dlang (guest, #313) [Link] (2 responses)

I have seen people say that anyone who supported prop 8 deserved to be permanently fired and banned from any contact with FOSS projects on top of that. You seemed to be going in that direction.

So people are only allowed to have 'approved' viewpoints if they are in some jobs, no matter how well they do those jobs or how they treat their employees and co-workers.

I despise the concept of "thought crimes" that punish people for things they think as opposed to actions that they take. (and the way someone votes, or a contribution to a political party or group should not have employment consequences)

On the sickness of our community

Posted Oct 24, 2014 16:36 UTC (Fri) by tao (subscriber, #17563) [Link] (1 responses)

Well, I haven't (nor would I have) advocated all supporters of prop 8 to be permanently banned & fired, so don't jump the gun prematurely.

But let's use a bit of hyperbole, shall we, just to poke a hole in your reasoning: let's say a Jew suddenly gets a new boss who donates money to the National Socialist Party of America (I have no idea if there's such a thing, this is all hypothetical after all). No matter how well said boss does his job, no matter how well he treats his employees I think it's pretty reasonable to accept that the Jew feels uneasy and would rather see the boss replaced by someone else.

Sometimes you have to choose whom you want to welcome -- a minority or persons make that minority feel unwelcome. Take misogynist free software developers vs female free software developers. In terms of contributions it might well be that the misogynists have/would contribute more (this is of course a case by case thing), but if I have a say in it the important thing is to make the females feel welcome, not to bend over for the misogynists, even if telling them to shut up & apologise or go away make them feel unwelcome.

Why? Because being a female isn't something wrong. Being a misogynist is. In a similar vein being a homosexual and wanting equal rights isn't something wrong. Supporting discrimination against homosexuals is.

On the sickness of our community

Posted Oct 24, 2014 20:36 UTC (Fri) by dlang (guest, #313) [Link]

> let's say a Jew suddenly gets a new boss who donates money to the National Socialist Party of America (I have no idea if there's such a thing, this is all hypothetical after all). No matter how well said boss does his job, no matter how well he treats his employees I think it's pretty reasonable to accept that the Jew feels uneasy and would rather see the boss replaced by someone else.

well, if the only way the Jew learns about the donation is from someone investigating the list of doners, then I would disagree.

i also disagree with the idea that it's a natural right (or whatever term you want to use) to not have someone make you feel "uncomfortable".

Yes, there are actions that are unreasonable and would deserve to have that hypothetical boss fired, but just donating and voting the "wrong" cause should not be among them


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