It's sad that you're probably serious

That depends on how they interpret 'driving'. The technical aspect of driving (starting your car, steering, etc.) is quite simple and can easily be learned in a few hours. There is a huge number of other skills that are harder to learn: knowing the rules, being aware of what is happening around you at all times, reacting properly if someone unexpected happens, etc. In my experience (The Netherlands) driving lessons and exams are only 10% about technicalities and 90% about everything else.