Your post makes the points that:
* RH pushes stuff upstream
* Porting patches from RH's kernel to stable is inherently difficult
I think the kernel developers already know this. They didn't question or complain about either of these things, they complained about the new Big Kernel Patch.
A sample good answer from RH would be "Ok, in future we'll set up a phone call between the relevant person here and the stable kernel maintainer before each release".
I'm not trying to embarrass RH by asking this question. On the contrary, I see them often as the role model for free software participation. So when they do something which shouldn't be copied by others, I think the question is worth asking: can this problem be fixed?
If this story was about Oracle, I wouldn't bother hoping for a fix.