Thanks everyone for the rants on why you hate SQL. The above gives us SQL geeks some useful feedback on what to focus on (or what to avoid) when teaching people to live with SQL.
I happen to like SQL a lot, although I can certainly imagine an alternative, better data manipulation language (XLST doesn't cut it, sorry). I understand that a lot of people don't, just as SGML and XML give me the hives, yet there's people who adore *them*. For that matter, I like Perl and C.
Oh, and PostgreSQL does support GROUP BY 1 (it's in the standard). I recommend against it, though, because it's a foot-gun.