Please notice that Dave is a man and use the gender appropriate pronoun, or if you are speaking in general please use the plural, as in English that is always gender neutral.
A maintainer can ask for too much, and that is why in Linux there is always the possibility to route around a maintainer. Not that this happens often.
In this case one of the primary complaints is poor userspace ABI design, and that is always a valid issue to push back on. Even the most temporary, transient and little used ABIs requires years to phase out.
Overall it appears to be a good thing this conversation is happening, and I hope this can get settled before too much more time passes.